"Grow A Penis"

I read somewhere, old Rotten.com I think, that the Spiro T. Agnew's name is an anagram for 'grow a penis'.

Yet a check on Google today revealed this self-evidently joky or at least fantastic phrase to be one that many take in full earnest. 

I find this disturbing.  I'd hope it'd be obvious that the plague of negative body image, usually associated with women, wouldn't be solved by making everyone equally miserable about our own shells.

At any rate boys there's really nothing you can do to make the penis you already have larger. The pills, the creams, etc are all bullshit.  I knew that y'all knew that already, logically; yet perhaps there was some part of you that couldn't accept being ...stuck with what you got and Wanted to believe that there was something to Extenze etc. This needling sense is what the bastards are count upon.  Reject it to the full.  Excessive masturbation can create the illusion of growth via swelling, and it's no accident that this is most always part of the scam artist's "treatment" but of course making your sex organ painful to the touch would be less than helpful in improving performance.

If, on the other hand you are a woman who wants to literally 'grow a penis'.  Steroid abuse, I hear, can effectively make the clitoris pupate in such a way.      Nasty business that shit, makes the sex hormones go completely off-kilter and all kinds of very bad things.  Or you can get an operative sex change with controlled hormone therapy.  Invent yourself as a man, and you've all liberty to make your cock into whatever form you like.  If you accept the skin you born into, do so truly, because there it is. 

Blue is The Warmest Color

How to say without coming across as sexist or philistine I don't know, but it's actually the most jarringly dull 'lesbian movie' I've ever seen bar this one.           Even when judging it as a relationship film as I suppose it's meant to be there's an undeniably plodding, devitalizing self-importance about the whole thing.  If a movie is going to be three hours long it should have; not violence per se, but yes it should have a regular dose of violence, or epic sweep of some kind anyway, definitely more than a single thread with two principles involved.  It doesn't help that the two leads are precisely the worst things they see in each other as they drift apart.  Emma is a snob's snob and Adele is profoundly needy and vapid.  That's not to say that the 'Blue' is an awful movie by any means; it just doesn't enthrall at anything close to a Palm d' Or or Best Picture level. 

I've Just Been Accosted by a Gay Man

"Ex-Gay" for the mement, now a member of Candlewood Church in Omaha and handing out Reese's Penut butter cups with pamphlets of his own creation.

"In 7th grade I realized I was attracted to men.  I did not know what to make of this attraction, but after experimenting, I knew it was not something I wanted to let control my liefe.  I had the idea that going to church might be the answer so I began visiting different churches in my neighborhood.  I landed at the church of Jehovah's Witness and began my relationship with God......"

".....While sharing my testimony, one student opened up and shared with me his struggles with bisexuality.  I had a heart for him and began sharing verses and preying for him.  We became so close that we actually began a relationship, which led me to leave the church and become more involved in the gay community...."

"....I received two full ride scholarships to the University of Nebraska at Omaha and had plans to move in the dorms and begin my college experience.  A week before I moved in, the guy who I thought I loved told me he wanted to pursue other relations...."



"....I asked my friend if he wanted to go for a walk.  I told him about my past, my relationships, being a Jehovah's witness, and telling how I felt.  He told me that in God's eyes all sin is equal.  So by me having an immoral relation with another guy, and someone else lying to their parents, in God's eyes both sins are equal.  That was the first time I had ever heard something like that...."

"...I thought homosexuality was the worst sin you could commit.  Hearing I was just as guilty as everyone else lifted weight off my shoulder...."


Long story short, the man's penance for being gay entails giving chocolates to other men.  Which is fine by me, Reese's and coffee on a cold day.  Hell yes. 

FC Top 10

1. Bayern Munich
2. Paris St. Germain
3. Real Madrid
4. Chelsea
5. Barcelona
6. Cruziero
7. Juventus
8. Arsenal
9. Olympiocos
10. Atletico Madrid

Been Quite Busy With My 'Day Job'

Just wanted to take a quick moment to say  ЛОЛ


ЛОЛ

Go Yanks!  Beat Canada!

As for you, US hockeyettes:  Damn.  Up by two with five minutes left.... and lost.  Damn.  Damn.   :-(


I could have guessed for myself that Bode Miller found losing his younger brother while still in his thirties highly unpleasant; is all I have to say on that matter.   

FC Top 10

1. Bayern Munich
2. Paris St. Germain
3. Barcelona
4. Chelsea
5. Real Madrid
6. Cruziero
7. Juventus
8. Arsenal
9. Olympiocos
10 Atletico Madrid

A Man I Know Is Dead

I knew him as Endo and nothing more.  He was my bosses' neighbor and thirty five, which I'll be soon, or at least that's statistically likely.  One week ago to this day Endo barricaded his apartment closed while his girlfriend was out shopping and than hung himself in their basement.  My boss, Mark, heard a strange metallic noise a grunt and then quiet, making nothing of it until the police and ambulance came to make official note several hours later.

Endo was Black with a White girlfriend, younger then him by some years.  Mark I'm sorry to say had a problem with this for awhile but came to like them both as a couple and as people in their own right.  I met them three or four times and spent maybe a total of one hour living a mutual life with them.  Looking back I note that both Endo and the living woman (name..... sorry) had a markedly constrained manner about them, one that reminds me of several peers of mine 'outstate' who have effectively given up on ever having a life that is more materially comfortable, or internally fuller or just in any way "more" in a positive sense.  It is to say the no shit a depressive way to live, but tolerable enough for most who have to. Most.  I know social statistics and such.  I know that suicide is one of the main causes of 'premature' death in Nebraska and other rural states.  Still, I wouldn't have guessed about Endo, and if I had then what?  Grab him by the arm and say "hey' you shouldn't kill yourself even if you really want to?"  We weren't even friends really.  I only knew him well enough for him to have existed as a soul to me.   I never would have guessed.

I mused before that when people who are still youngish kill themselves it is generally due to love/sex/relationship issues with money as a distant second.  Endo had both from what I've heard in days after.  Apperently the girlfriend was handling the bulk of mutual support and had come to resent this.  Came from a wealthier family or held a steadier job or something.  Endo did own a shady garage on N street in the region where downtown gradually peters into neighborhood.  I remember it was very dusty and rather cold though when it was still September when I was there.  There are 'scrapers' about my hood.  Not thieves mind you but just men who will ply their old pickup trucks through the area searching backyards for junked grills, batteries tools etc without inquiring if these things were so junked as they appeared.  Then they take their findings to a place like Endo had; collect their cash with no need for ID and address like the corporate recycling joints demand anymore.  This thing they do is a major economy in the whole northeast quadrant of Lincoln, which isn't really "that" poor at all so, you could well imagine, anyway.

Anyway Endo lost his garage on account his polidrug habit.  His marijuana was always excellent and for extra cash he would sell what he didn't smoke sometimes, an insufficient trickle.  He was very casual about driving his girlfriends unplated car around for hours tipsy with no license and whatever contraband in his pocket; which which in hindsight may look the sign of extreme indifference to one's future and I suppose it is.  Then again I've done that myself and got away with it; mainly.  Here I am. It was undoubtedly the crystal meth that poisoned him the most, nothing that hasn't been said about that shit.  He and the woman are both in thrall to it and it may indeed have been the primary thing that bound them together, though I hate to think so.  I also hate to think that Endo, who was mild and friendly towards others, even kind in his own way, had killed himself mainly to 'break it off' with his lover in a way  so dramatic that she could never outdo him and therefore 'win' their mutual acrimony.  The nagging truth of it is that while may not have been The motive for what he did it wasn't not a motive either.  Still  I remember him well.  He was a good man. 

FC Top 10

1. Bayern Munich
2. Paris St. Germain
3. Barcelona
4. Chelsea
5. Real Madrid
6. Cruziero
7. Juventus
8. Arsenal
9. Olympiocos
10. Atletico Madrid

Ahh: The Olympics

Imperialist dick-strutting retro-fitted into a sort of Brotherhood of Man peace and love brouhaha.  Of course it's not terribly convincing at all.  The original, adversarial nationalist intent is still very loudly there.  It is still, after all, still flag vs. flag for a place on the medal stand.  Some say it's much better than war if nationalist dick-waving there must be, and that's undoubtedly true, though also a pretty obviously retro-fitted rationale, but never mind.

At any rate, my own nationalist dream would be for US hockey to beat Russia on it's home ice.  Miricle on Ice to the X squared.  Make it happen baby.  Do it for us 'White Ethnics." *

*:  Though, in all civilized fairness, and deepest sincerity, "Song of the Volga Boatmen" is the most God Damned magnificent thing I have ever heard. 

This Winter Actually has Been God Damned Bitter

I don't like it.  I'm chill-blooded and a hundred unbroken days in the 20's and 30's F would suit me just fine.  But this endless train of Northern blasts is depressing.  Christ. 

It is; at least, late enough in the winter to hope that this is the last strrtch of "Truly Cold" weather, near zero or below.  In November I was sanguine towards the coming cold season but now I find myself having built up a deeply sincere hatred for both nature and nature's god; and I don't even believe in the latter. 

FC top 10

1. Bayern Munich
2. Paris St. germain
3. Atletico Madrid
4. Arsenal
5. Barcelona
6. Cruziero
7. Juventus
8. Chelsea
9. Olympiocos
10 Real Madrid