Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Polish Nazis: The Only Logical Conclusion of the Polish Joke

Fellas, I, I just um, damn,  I don't even know;  I mean really, seriously? 

For what it's worth, the most direct Polish version of 'Uncle Ruckus" is "Wujek Ruckus" according to google translator. 

These guys may also get along famously with Sonny Landham, most famous for playing 'Chief' in 1987's 'Predator' and more recently somewhat less famous as a Cherokee/Seminole White supremicist.  He tried to join his castmates in a governor's chair, running for Kentucky top spot in 2004, but found that his natural constituency of self-loathing Metis was too small to make a voting majority. 

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Bob Kerrey

I was a teenager when this man was last a US Senator for Nebraska.  I have no memory of whether or not he's always been this flaky.      He is a Democrat, one of the few that have ever win high office here as Nebraska was born and remained solidly Republican through all of that Party's evolutions; from post-Civil War consensus to WASP chamber of commerce to White nationalist jackass brigade.  Anyway we have a Senate seat up for election this year, and since sort of- Democrat Ben Nelson has decided to make no effort to maintain his seat.  This means that one of the two main GOP contenders, Jon Bruning or Don Stenberg, (Both of them the sort of oily machine man that an old Chicago Democrat would take for his own) will win it.  Thus giving Republicans the clean sweep of major state offices that they have been increasingly open about their sense of entitlement to as the national party has tacked to the far right and urban/rural tension has grown increasingly personal and bitter.

Unless Kerrey jumps in; in which case... well maybe not.  He's won here before, overcoming some very overt sentiment that every real Nebraskan is Republican.  He has a war hero record, losing half a leg and winning the Medal of Honor in Vietnam, and had been able to use that record to cover for his democraticness.  Whether he'd be able to do so again...  Well, his record has been clouded since his Senate days, to put it lightly.  And at any rate the Real American crowd has long ago stopped pretending to believe  that losing a limb for one's country is any pardon for the treason of voting Democrat.

He does have some generally likable qualities.  Next to George Norris he is the most openly liberalish statewide politician Nebraska has ever had.  Which is to say... nothing at all, I realize.  Still he was progressive on gay rights by the standard of the time and even dared to be pro-choice...ish.  Enough to gain the eternal enmity of the anti-women-having-sex crowd. 

Currently the main Democratic candidate is Chuck Hassebrook.  Former university regent, advocate for rural poor, and a good man.  One who is being done wrong by all this, has been unafraid to say so, and of course has every right to say so.  Still he has no chance in hell and part of him must know that. The world is a twisted place, and you can understand why we besiged Husker Democrats would prefer to pull an old proven winner out of the bullpen.   

Friday, February 24, 2012


I heard a woman describe a romantic pair in which both had Down Syndrome as "cute."  I really have no idea what to say to that; but anyway...

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Chan Marshall

She reveals herself as something of a drama/attention junkie, at least on Facebook.  That's  fine by me.  I have never bought into the idea that it's somehow distasteful  for professional entertainers, of all people, to seek attention, and in fact, it only makes me love this woman even more. 

Mhmmmmmm. American Earth Mother. 

Sunday, February 19, 2012

Top 10 FC's

1. Real Madrid
2. AC Milan
3. Bayern Munich
4. Barcelona
5. Benfica
6. Basel
7. Manchester United
8. Paris St. Germain
9. Juventus
10 Manchester City

After Some Reading and Internet Arguing

I've recently read David Frum's very sharp column from last year on the tendency to equate sacred liberty with common 'folkways'.  "there are many people to whom that pattern of life means more than trial by jury or even freedom of the press."  And I've also revisited Jonah Goldberg's hackneyed (as if this needs to be said coming from him) interpretation of 'Groundhog Day' from the 'top 25 conservative movies' list. 
"For the conservative, the moral of the tale is that redemption and meaning are derived not from indulging your 'authentic' instincts and drives, but from striving to live up to external and timeless ideals"

You've probably heard the phrase 'mindless confomity' bandied about quite a bit in your life.  The truth is that conformity is rarely mindless at all, but rather based upon genuine moral ideals that are no less than half-conciously realized, and often thouroughly considered.  There is a genuine belief here that a utilitarian morality, in which anything that picks no pockets or breaks no legs is allowed, is demeaning and beastial.  Any dog can eat, drink, sleep and screw based on its own arbitrary whims, without any elaborate dance of custom or ritual about it, so that the universe may know that it has a mind and a sense of self capible of such a dance. 

It is also often said that conservative authoritarians are against happiness and pleasure.  This is only half-true.  Happiness and pleasure are bad only if, again, they come from feeding some arbritary desire from with in.  When happiness is a brass ring to grab, a mountain to climb, a goal imposed by the greater external authority of God/nature, than it is not only good but glorious.  Or, to put it another way, the conservative understanding of happiness is best defined as...

Knowledge is all well and good, but gaining a college degree is first and foremost an act of victory.  Believing in good things is all well and good, but the most important aspect of choosing the correct beliefs is that the holder is first and foremost victorious for having chosen them, and the validity of any belief system is measured in no small way by how much it emphasizes this personal victory. 

At the social level, true love is fine, sure, but marraige is the victory.  Financial security is grand, but it's the big house in the suburbs with the three big cars in the driveway that let's the world know that you have won.  And these are trophies that must be universally aspired to in order to maintain their rightful level of prestige.  Any suggestion that there is not a single, eternal American dream that all instinctively long for is an attempt to cheat the winners out of their victories.  And if those who sincerely do not want this dream are socially broken into persuing it anyway; well, anything that adds  struggle and sublimity to the game is only for the better. 

Whenever you read or hear some zealots rant about the universal, externally mandated nature of his beliefs, you will get the more or less overt implication that their beliefs are true precisely because they are universal.  Where the egalitarian feels oppressed by the thought of imposed universal truth, the authoritarian feels empowered by it.  Not just by their imagined right to enforce therse values upon strangers, though that's no small part of it, but by the idea that everything about their lives and their Selves; their religion, politics, occupation, love life, culture, nationality, language, wardrobe, material possesions; is an act of soldierly duty to the eternal and divine. 

To give one example of how this works, think of the arguments of how gay marraige will 'destroy marraigs as we know it', or even simply 'destroy marraige'.  In as much as this is anything more than bullshit sloganeering, the implication here is that straight couples are entitled to the sense of being exceptional for being normal.  Obviously this claim of entitlement is a hopeless contradiction; imaginary and impossible to satisfy.  Yet it pokes its head into just about every facet of our politics, culture, and lives. It is clearly the most precious thing that many people hope to gain from the greater society, and they will not easily surrender the notion that simply living within the mainstream is in itself an act of transcendent glory.

Friday, February 17, 2012

I confess.

At first I thought this fellow was suggesting that women use asprin powder to deaden their vj's;  much like the old street trick of men putting coke on their junk to 'go longer'.  Only later was it explained to me that this is an old metaphor for proper ladies keeping their legs shut. 

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

US Government Officially Declares Jumping off Buildings Safer than Smoking Pot

Not that 'Parkour' can't be deeply compelling, or even a downright inspiring act of defiance against mortal limitations.  It's just that dropping LSD accomplishes both of these things with half the physical risk. 

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Old Millwaukee Shows MIA How to Really Troll the Super Bowl

North Platte Nebraska, my hometown, is home to some twenty four thousand people, and happens to lie in one of the few regions of the First World where a place of such size is large enough to be considered a city, meriting its own NBC affiliate.  Out out of the 210 recognized 'media markets' in the United States, the North Platte market ranks 209th in population.  So the seven hundred dollars that Pabst Brewing Company reportedly paid KNOP-TV for the right to show the spot is actually a bit more than the standard going rate.  In return they for this the ad has gotten close to 800,000 views on youtube and probably several million hits over all thanks to the curiosity expressed towards this novelty on several other websites.

Pure fucking genius.  And I can personally add that there is no small amount of Old Milwaukee consumed in North Platte.  I'd even guess that someone involved in the production of this thing knew this to be so.  Whether through actually researching the culture of North Platte or simply adding two and two after noting its lonely position on the map; who's to say? 

P.S: Congrats on scoring a touchdown in the Super Bowl Woodhead.  It's a shame that your team lost.  Though the even bigger pity for you personally is that you weren't born into a soccer-playing culture.  Your body type and skill set has much more in common with this guy then with any of those NFL brutes you tussle with.

You could of been worth nine figures by now.  Not that you're doing so badly for yourself.  

Sunday, February 5, 2012

FC Top 10

1. Real Madrid
2. Barcelona
3. AC Milan
4. Bayern Munich
5. Benfica
6. Basel
7. Manchester United
8. Paris St. Germain
9. Juventus
10. Manchester City

As for our own football; go... Patriots, I guess?  I'm a 49'ers fan.  

Thursday, February 2, 2012

OK, GOP, It's Like This

Pimping the Keystone pipeline is not going to score any points for you.  The White, rural, highly conservative demographic of the Great Plains are either actively opposed or at best very suspicious of it.  There is no great crowd of blue-colar alpha-males holding their lunchpails full of flags in hand and waiting for you to deliver them the salvation of short-term jobs so they can reward you with votes.  There is nothing that you can gain from this.  At all.  I know you have corperate donors to satisfy but isn't there.... never mind, for a minute there I was going to suggest that there must be some higher priority for you than that, how stupid of me.  Still it would be better if you put at least five seconds of thought into your psuedopopulist blather so that it sounds like something.... better than this. 

Dude, did you seriously just try to pass off Facebook as elitist.  I mean... no, just, seriously, no.... seriously? 
He has a Facebook page of his own, of course...!/billcassidy?sk=wall  it's been SOP for members of Congress for at least five or six years now, or about as long as it's been since Facebook had a bonafide blue-collar rival in Myspace.  And inasmuch as there's any honesty or thought in Cassidy's statement at all (doubtful) he may be be surprised to know that it's been even longer since a having a FB profile has conveyed any sense of social specialness.  I don't know if you know this Bill, but it isn't just for college students and upscale urban professionals anymore.  Facebook is free man. (and always will be!) it says so right there on the front page .  My family members, (Not to go into too much depth), truck drivers, construction workers, railroad men, ex cons; all of them have children to take care of, and all of them are sending me requests for Mafia Wars as I type this. Everybody has Facebook you minister of accidental condensation.  You should check to see who on your staff is failing to give you basic info before you pretend to identify with people who would force you into an hour long shower if they accidentially breathed your air.  Jackass. 

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

In Fundieland, There is such a Thing as 'Testable Beliefs'

"Name two major world religions and argue against them using either the laws of logic, scientific evidence or historical evidence. Explain the concept of middle knowledge, and why it is relevant to the problem of religious pluralism.
SAMPLE ANSWER: Refute Theravada Buddhism with the big bang, or refute Islam with the crucifixion of Jesus, etc. MUST mention specific beliefs of that religion that are testable, and not just argue that they reject Christianity and are therefore false. Explain how middle knowledge reconciles free will and divine sovereignty, and that it also helps to solve the problem of people who have never heard the gospel.
BONUS POINTS: Using evidence that is universally accepted by people outside of that religion. Using scientific evidence. Referencing Acts 17:27 or other Bible passages when explaining middle knowledge. Mentioning objections to middle knowledge, such as the grounding objection.
WHY IT MATTERS: Many younger Christians today believe that Christianity is moralistic therapeutic deism. They think that the purpose of religion is to have good feelings and to be nice to other people and to make other people feel good. It’s all about feelings. You need to make sure that she knows how to make people feel bad and is comfortable doing it, with evidence. Middle knowledge also grounds the person’s willingness to see people as being responsible for their acceptance or rejection of Christ. Instead of taking a hands-off fatalistic approach to salvation, someone who accepts middle knowledge is going to take persuasion seriously and expend effort to try to change the people around them."

 As for demanding a spouse who is so identical to you in thought and belief as to make every act of  'husbandly duty' one of autoincest...  well I suppose that's nothing new among the asshole set.  But subjecting your would-be wife to an actual formalized test of conformity and submission is at least somewhat novel.